Sunday...

*Sigh*

I really am thankful that I chose to engage in all this shedding. Really. I do feel pretty tired, mentally, though.

Today, I am reminded yet again that I tend to take myself too seriously. I tend to take life too seriously as well. And what for?? It is not something that I choose to do consciously...it just starts happening when I feel stressed (I think). And then, it just spirals outta control.

Life is not without its messes, minor disasters, pains, wipeouts, upsets and general chaos and insanity. The trick, I think, is to just roll with the punches and let it all be okay. Basically, I can't think of one single thing from the last couple of weeks that is permanent in my life. Everything changes, so why not sit back and enjoy the show?

It has been challenging for me to realize that I have to let go of some relationships. Just as much, the boundaries of my existing relationships may, in fact, need to change. This is where a lot of stuff comes up...then, there are my children. Gotta love 'em! Just don't love their messes. And this is leading me to draw new boundaries for mess makers. Heh. I don't know what all this is going to end up looking like (and the joy is that I don't have to know) and I am not in this to win a popularity contest!

I think that I am done with the judgment. Many of my family members have not been shy about their feelings about how I live my life. Um, did I ask for your opinion? Really? You don't have other things to worry about or to focus on? The way I choose to live my life is right for me. And it is my right to make my own choices and my own mistakes and my own messes. No one has to agree with me. No one has to do it my way. And ultimately, I know that I have done my best. My best has changed thru the years; that is how this thing called Life works. You make a mistake, you hopefully learn from the experience, you don't do the same thing again. Unless you are insane (doing the same thing over and over and over again, expecting different results). I try to avoid the insanty.

I love my family. They still need to fuck off.

Just keep breathing; it's all good.